Tuesday, October 30, 2007

November 1, 2007

Tomorrow, I will go to the cemetery for the first time...since Mama's death.
I refused to go there. I did not even go there when they were constructing it.
A form of denial I guess.

Part of me still feels that I can still go home to Bauang, see her, tell stories, watch her prepare what special food she has for us, remove her white hairs, have her massage my head...


Halsema Highway...milking cow of the privileged?

For a change, I am writing on a different topic.

I read the Midland Courier every sunday and I just don't feel comfortable with all the write ups about Mountain Province, specifically the Halsema Highway.

Like what Senator Miriam Santiago said, "pinag-aawayan nyo lang ang mga kickback nyo!"

Since I started travelling Halsema Highway in 1999, I see little improvement in the Mountain Province area. While the Benguet side is already paved and done with, the Mountain Province area is still the same "old rugged road".

Even with no articles in the Midland, even with no exposes, common sense will tell us that the Halsema Highway is the milking cow of the privileged. It is a perfect example of "corruption to the highest level". I have seen the studies done in the area, read it, and it is really so disgusting.

The paid ad about Juniper Dominguez...attacking his personality, telling everyone he is an ex-convict, etc...what does it have to do with his exposes on the Halsema Highway corruption? Personalan naman na to the highest level! Who are those who signed in the manifesto anyway? Can they say they are the most righteous contractors in Mountain Province? Can they say that they are more Honorable than Juniper Dominguez because they did not spend a single day in prison? Are they trying to say that ex convicts cannot be trusted? Can't they live changed lives? I believe...Juniper Dominguez is more honorable than them.

During the last elections, so much has been heard again about Mountain Province. I believe the bickerings is not political in nature. It is not even about the Anglican church...I think it is all about money. The contratas they can get. Who gets favored and how they are favored. Truth hurts.

Ineh! Mama, datusa an ipugao ay mangpakpakaan ken sak-en idi wada ak ed Sabangan. I see familiar names and signatures in the manifesto. People who called me Kulityagang. People who tried to initiate to oust me from Mountain Province because I am an Ilocano.

Now, with what you are doing, are you bringing glory or shame to Mountain Province?

Friday, October 26, 2007

Do I really have to?

Press conference?
I don't like it. For what?
Tell everyone I am grieving?
What for? Tell them Mama's death was politically motivated?
What else do I have to tell them?
That no lawyer would want to take on the case because they are afraid?
That whoever is interested to take on the case, is, in one way or the other, connected with the mastermind?
What else do people want to know, that they want to hear directly from me?

This is the only thing I want to say right now, and it is better if I don't go to those press conferences:

I am so disgusted. I am so dismayed...to the highest level.
They do not deserve their salary.
The "honorable" attached to their name should be "DISHONORABLE".
The title they worked so hard to get for eight long years, they do not deserve to have. Money is all that they wanted.
The system needs overhauling.

One day, soon...all their riches will be mine.
All that they have now, all they are holding on to right now, will go to nothing. It will be thrown in the pit.
One day, soon...they will realize, all power belongs to God.
Justice and vindication is in God's hands.

I will wait on God's justice and vindication.

I don't want to attend press conferences.
I don't want to attend rallies.

What for?
Forgiving everyday is already a struggle.
Get real.

Tuesday, October 23, 2007

I am not voting...yet

On October 29, 2007, many will be voting for the Barangay Elections. My Lolo Kito's brother is running for Barangay Captain in Sobredillo, where I vote. I would want to vote for him...but I have already decided not to vote since last month.

Not yet, that is. I don't know if I will vote...ever again. Maybe...but not in my hometown...anymore...i think. I don't know. I'm not really sure. Mama's death is still too painful.

I lost faith in it? Maybe. But I am not losing hope.

I am hoping that one day, a new breed of leaders will be seating. Not the politicians who are holding office, who are only after their own gains. Not "leaders" who will have people killed for their own ends. Not "leaders" who only enrich themselves. Not "leaders" who are so hungry for power.

In my lifetime, I would also like to see leaders who are really leaders. Leaders who respect the lives and the rights of their constituents. Leaders who fear God...who really fear God...as in truly fear God.

I hope....I am praying for it.

Sunday, October 07, 2007

Thank God!

I thank God for friends
I thank God for my Victory Christian Fellowship family
I thank God for Rianne
I thank God for Rhyss
I thank God for Carlo
I thank God for my TESDA-CAR family
I thank God for Jazel, Ate Kit, Ate Marife, Ate Daisy
I thank God for Homer's family who cares so much about my sister
I thank God for my small group - Kat, Aileen, Katrina, Ate Annie, Ate Janisal,
Ate Marie, Ate Gilda, Sarah
I thank God for my UP-IM friends
I thank God for Rianne's blockmates
I thank God for the Intercessory ministry
I thank God for Ate Julieta and Pastor Julius, Ate Rosy and Pastor Lino, Ate
Roselle, Perps, Ate Leila and Kuya Romy, Ate Kit and Kuya Jigs
I thank God for Ate Pia and Pastor Mike
I thank God for Lemuel
I thank God for Auntie Edna and Auntie Reina
I thank God for Uncle Aldong
I thank God for Lola Febe
I thank God for the Las-Ud family
I thank God for UCCP-Caba
I thank God for LGU-Bauang
I thank God for Sir Bobby and Ma'am Ruth Jo
I thank God for SPO1 Bernadette and Leo
I thank God for Manang Violy and Manong Danny
I thank God for Manang Maritess and Manong Tirso
I thank God for Manang Soling
I thank God for Manong Vic and Milyong
I thank God for Auntie Fe and her family and Auntie Tita
I thank God for the privilege of being raised up by Papa and Mama and for the
privilege being taken cared of by Lolo Kito
I thank God for everything that I am going through. I thank God for His grace.
I thank God for showing us favor. I thank God for He is sooo real.